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Faith, Belief, Serenity..these are the things that keep me going..Hello there, my name is Tiffany..or aka as Fluffy..I am 49 and counting, child of our amazing God, Mimi, wife, mom, daughter, nurse, and am on a not so straight path to make this life the best it can possibly be. Not only for myself, but I hope by sharing my personal journey to inspire other women with a daily infusion of God's Word, positivity, and a few health and wellness tips along the way!! Be Blessed and make the day as amazing as you are!!!

Tuesday, April 29, 2014

Putting Fluffy on hold for a bit

Good Morning to all,I have to admit the Positivity Plan has been blown completely out of the water, have no energy to exercise 2 times a day, or even 1 at this point, no desire to read, mentally exhausted.., I spent yesterday so pissed off due to the rudeness that I experienced and the games people play that I feel that I need to take a breather..deserted Island would would be super at this point. This blog is supposed to be about motivation and positive actions and I am honestly just not feeling it at this period in time. When I get to a better place I will start writing again. I wish you all a good Wednesday.

Friday, April 25, 2014

Missed a day...oopps..was 'On the Road again'!!

Good Morning all..sorry for yesterday but was driving all day..once more I find myself in Kaiserslautern..was really not wanting to leave home again so soon as I was only there for a couple of weeks but..what are ya gonna do?? Work is work, mine just happens to be several hours from home.
So, what have I learned over the last couple of days??
1. That people actually work for the normal, everyday middle class as concierges, doing eveything from organizing taxes, gardening, shopping..you need it done..they can do it.I found this interesting.
2. That there is a 50's themed diner in Germany...the fasination here for all things American is interesting, kind of like a strange love- hate relationship.
3. That there is a difference in the definitions of Envy and Jealousy, and even better there are 2 types of Envy..benign and malicious. Envy is wanting something that someone else has and jealousy is being afraid of loosing something. Malicious envy is the act of hurting someone to get what you want..(that they have), and benign envy can actually be positive..to work as motivator, to make you work harder for what you want.
So, new day..time to learn something else..we are taking our physical fitness test this morning..so morning workout will be done early! If yesterday was any sign the weather should be gorgeous over the next couple of days..lots of outside time in the late afternoon!!
Have a great Saturday..

Thursday, April 24, 2014

New word learned....

Good evening to you all..due to a challenge from one of my very dear friends and follower of Fluffy I will be posting everyday what I learned the day before..yesterday I learned the meaning of a new word..while reading posts on..of all places..facebook.. I came across the word ENTROPHY..this was (before yesterday) one that I had never seen before. So, googled it and found this definition 'Enrophy- is a measure of the specific ways in which a thermodynamic system may be arranged, often taken as a measure of disorder, or a measure of progressing towards thermodynamic equilibrium.' with furter reading I learned that a German Physicist, Rudolf Clausius (1822-1888) is considered to be the quote unquote father of the concept of entropy.
So..first thing learned, not bad for day number 1!! As for creating, I made homemade bread today, and for color..well here you have it..and I am wearing a tshirt with bright blue writing on it...paired with pink fuzzy socks!! Got my hair cut yesterday and took a nap today as well as called my parents for some positve reinforcement..that always makes my day better, even when all is not so hunky dorey thay always help me put things into a better perspective. 
Finally recieved a letter from the youngest today, he is in Basic training..was happy to hear from him..ARMY STRONG!!
So, wonderful people..I am off to make dinner for my hubby and settle in for the evening..be blessed and hug someone you love!! 

Wednesday, April 23, 2014

Positivity plan....los gehts!!

Good afternoon! As promised..my Positivity Plan.....

1. 3030  as mentioned yesterday-study Bible for 30 minutes everyday
2. Pray and journal daily..as many times as needed
3. Listen to more music and watch WAY less TV
4. Purge house of unused items..clothing, dishes, whatever
5. DO NOT PROCRASTINATE
6. Drink 2 liters of water daily..this is great except for around 0400..;D
7. Blog daily
8. Take better care of myself..by this I mean more girly things like getting my hair cut on a regular basis, doing my nails, taking long walks....
9. Learn something new everyday..through reading, exploring, talking to people, internet search, reading the back of a cereal box..whatever works
10. 2 exercise sessions daily
11. Get outdoors as much as possible
12. CREATE!!!!!!
13. Incorporate more color into my life..

So, there we have it..putting into action..will keep you all updated on how this works for me.

Monday, April 21, 2014

Tuesday..a new day..a new attitude??!!

Good Morning..for all of you followers of Fluffy you know I have really been going through a hard time recently..I have been letting the actions and decisions of others steal my happiness, my positivity, and my sense of worth and well being...So, today I am going to try something new..I have broken out the bright colored gel pens and have started to write out a Positivity Plan, I have 7 points on it so far and will list them all for you later today or tomorrow when I finish organizing my thoughts, actions, and goals. On thing that I have commmited to is a 3030 plan created by Joyce Meyers, it is a challange if you will of reading and really studying the Bible for 30 minutes for 30 days. I am, sadly one of those when things get really rough I tend to back off on my conversation time with God instead of ramping it up, like a small child I get my feelings hurt and feel like I am being punished when things start going wrong and I tend to pout and isolate..so, lesson here..try something new..increase my time and effort spent and see what happens.I am going to start with the book of Psalms, not for any special reason other than it has has always been my 'go to' when I need inspiration and a sense of peace.
I have to be honest here, I am feeling a bit lost in the moment, no kids at home, no school to prepare for, no daily structure outside of this house..I need something but I do not know what it is..my husband tells me to take some time and 'come down' from my previous hectic existence but it is not so easy for me to do..I am trying though. Of course I know all would be easier if things were in order and all was well in my world but it is not so I struggle..but will keeping trying. So, this morning I am going to attack downstairs, do a little rearranging and cleaning, work up a sweat on the treadmill, walk my dogs, and then leave the house for the first time in a few days..I hope all of you have a wonderful day.

Sunday, April 20, 2014

Okay..so we are not the Easter Bunny but oh so cute!!


 Hallo liebe Leute!! I want to wish you all a very happy and blessed Easter..Have included a bunch of photos for you all today, lots of sweet babies , finished projects, and flowers, flowers, and more flowers!!As you can see Max, Marli, and Melissa are enjoying the good life..no worries here!! I am continuing on my new journey to a life filled with not so much stress..the Sererity Prayer has come in pretty handy over the last few days..for those of you who are not familiar...
God, grant me the serenity to change the things I can, accept the things I can't and the wisdom to know the difference.
I am beginning to come to accept that I (we)..but as this is my blog and not my husbands... cannot please everyone and to understand that I alone am not responsible for other people's actions, reactions and decisions..at times this really causes some pain but I have come to a point in my life that I no longer want to compromise my life and my well being (we are talking mentally here folks..)
 for the fact that just because others expect certain things it does not mean that I have to jump when plans are made and fingers are snapped. With the changes and issues that we have had to deal with for quite a while now and the fact that certain things have finally blown up both my husband and myself are learning a very precious lesson..and that lesson is how to say NO!! We are lucky enough to have a few..and I am talking a very few people in our lives that understand and do not give us a bunch of grief when we say that we need time to ourselves..and for those people I am grateful..they understand that the world does not revolve around them and their desires..
When I liquidated our lives in the states little did I know that my life journey would be taking me down these paths that we are experiencing..I was expecting to be a slightly high strung girl from Texas who loves people and likes to have fun transplanted into another country and that all was going to be peachy keen and life would be filled with unicorns and rainbows..little did I expect what started about a month after we arrived..it has not been easy and continues to not be easy but I have learned alot about myself and how to deal with not so pleasant issues  (yes..this does include taking a time out..for as long as I need)..in the states I would have probably said 'peace out' long ago and moved to another part of the country..the beach is sounding really good about now.... but living here has helped me to mature and grow as an individual..mature is the key word here..as I have been made to stay put and deal with a bunch of crap..of course most of the crap (not all ...mind you) never would have occured previously but as we say in this house 'it is what it is'. At any rate I am super blessed to be married to this man.. who..bless his heart had no idea whatsoever he was getting himself into as he also expected the whole rainbow and unicorn senerio..but hey..I must say, despite all of the crap..trying to keep it clean here as it is after all Sunday..we are growing closer as a couple..
So, I think in my next life I will become a psychologist..too late in this one!! As far as Fluffyseekingfirm..the time on the treadmill has been boosted up to 60 minutes a day..so far that is equals out to a little over 7 kilometers..not so fast but over time the distance will increase..increasing the crunches and have incorporated a balance ball into the mix also..at the end of the day I am wiped out..but at least sleep is once more becoming familiar..pretty 


 excited about that fact. Below are pics of the completed wine rack..all decopouged out..as you can see..I don't use it as a wine rack but for a cookbook holder..so a totally custom peice for about 20 Euro. I am loving the results. Today is a good day, the sun is shining, we are here together, planning to grill, have heard form my oldest son..hoping to hear from the other..Wishing all of you a wonderful day with whoever you spend it with..or maybe you are taking the day to do nothing and enjoying the peace of being alone..that too is completely okay!!





Thursday, April 17, 2014

Putting on rain boots.....

 Hello to you all..sorry about missing yesterday..was having a pity party day but with the help of some emails and a good long conversation with one of my girlfriends and coming to the realization that I am not reponsible for others peoples actions or decisions..oh..and the fact that the sun has finally come out and I am able to sit outside to write this..I am striving to push the negative thoughts and worry out of my head..really..
In an email I recieved this morning it had a quote in it..'Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass..it is about learning to dance in the rain.' So for now..in this moment I am mentally looking for and putting on my rain boots to do some dancing. My real rain boots are a boring tan color but in this case we will pretend they are covered in bright colored flowers.
As, promised when the tulips that we planted last fall bloomed I would include pics..here are a couple and onr of the wine rack that I have decided to focus some of my energy on..I have to admit..decopouging is a great way to loose yourself for a couple of hours
at a time..should be finished with it in a couple of days..will of course post pics of the finished product. With the main situation that I am dealing with right now e few people have told me that I have to 'let go and let God' am trying hard to do that but it is much easier said than done..it is times like this that I would give anything to have a church to go to where I could loose myself in singing praise and worship songs..way too unconventional for where I live now but it is nice to wish for something..there is a Christian misic festival in Chattanooga every year called JFest..I went to it for several years and I must say seeing so many people together singing and worshipping is pretty awesome. Brings a sense of renewal and fresh air to your everyday doings. Okay, the wind has blown the clouds back in..it is now officially too cold to sit outside..so..until tomorrow..have a blessed day.

Monday, April 14, 2014

Everyday a little better...

Guten Morgen, have started my day watching a morning show that informed all of Deutschland that Booty Shaking is the next dance phase..scary, scary thought. That, however prompted me to turn off the TV and prepare a healthy veggie soup for us for dinner tonight..why?? you ask am I fixing soup for dinner at 0630? Number 1 because I may just venture out of the house today and number 2 because things like soup and chili taste better a while after they have been prepared, not immediately. My mind has been turning more and more towards planning a visit to the Chatanooga area..Matthias and I both miss what the city had to offer, not to mention the friends we have there. The sun is once more playing hide and seek this morning..it is supposed to be cold through today and starting a warming trend tomorrow, maybe that is why the warm South has been on my mind so much..the weather..being able to wear season appropriate clothing and being outdoors more often than not. Have been hitting the treadmill pretty hard over the last few days, staying on for no less than 45 minutes at a time and following the run up with floor exercises such as crunches, push ups, arm curls, and yes..you can totally laugh here..booty exercises...;D I must say with all that has been occuring in our lives, me being at home for more than a couple of days, and my increase in physical activity I have been crashing and burning every evening..my normal go to bed time is 2015 but over the past few days I am really having a hard time making it past about 1930 without passing out on the couch..I feel that is my body's way of recovering from what has been going on..seeking a sense of balance..not always go go go push harder. 
The flower bulbs that we planted in the fall are trying to come out full force..the tulips are waiting..like me for the sun..maybe tomorrow, will post some pics of them when they make a showing.

Sunday, April 13, 2014

Introspection..not always easy but so very important

Good morning to all. Am hoping that with 2 days in a row not only can we reconnect but maybe even find some new readers of Fluffy..would love to have contact and input from people all over the world as I believe that we can always learn something from everyone we meet;about them, their culture, their experiences..and if we are really lucky..we can learn something about ourselves along the way. I am still struggling not to be disappointed with my decision not to continue with school but as my dear, sometimes not so subtle husband put it yesterday..'when you are finished you will be almost 50'..hard pill to swallow for someone who is still really only 33 or so in her minds eye but at the same time made me realize that he is indeed correct..why not enjoy life for what it is?? That and 2 of my friends congratulated me on making the decision to slow it down..both know of some really hard times for me previously and their views and opinions mean the world to me. So, ladies..Thank you from the bottom of my heart..
I have to be totally honest here folks..the weather is crap and I am really enjoying the ability to be home for a couple of weeks and am celebrating by wearing sweats..big, sloppy, completely unattractive, warm sweats, no make up, hair stuck up on my head with a rubber band..and you know what..for the first time in a really long time I feel no guilt. My plan today is to hang out with my critters..who by the way are super happy to have me at home!!, decopauge (sp??) a wine rack, and get in a good long workout before the end of the day..
For anyone out there who has been struggling with stress, anxiety and- or depression it is not a sign of weakness, please do what ever you need to to either get help or change your life. You are the most important thing in your life, take care of you. Sometimes we do not realize how stressed out, burnt out or whatever label you want to put on it until we hit a wall that we cannot walk around, go through or climb over..it is in these times that I feel God is sending us not so gentle signals that we need to change what we are doing..whether is by subtracting, adding, dividing something in our lives..maybethis is a bit deep for a blog, esp a public blog but for the life of me I cannot imagine that I am the only one who struggles with what we are supposed to be, how we are supposed to look, what we are supposed to drive, that we are always to be quote unquote ON. Sometimes demands and responsibilities get to be too much and you know what?? It is completely okay to take a time out and search your soul for who you are and who you want to be..when I was a relatively new nurse my mom gave me a book titles Light for my Path for Nurses..I had not read it for many years but packed it up with me on my last time away from home and found this passage from Florence Nightengale..(yes..I did previously post on facebook..but for those who have not ever read it before..) Live your life while you have it. Life is a splendid gift-there is nothing small about it.
I wish you all a blessed and wonderful Monday..

Lets have a heart to heart

Guten Morgen...I seem to have to apologize to the readers of Fluffy more often than not recently...for the fact that life and the stress of it has gotten in the way of my creativity and positivity. Over the past few weeks there has been alot that has transpired in our lives, and not all of it for the better..some has been great..for example Dalton leaving to start his life in the Army but even that and the adjustment for us as Empty Nesters has caused a certain amount of stress..unfortunantly other issues have caused a great deal of unrest in our lives, but with some readjusting and change of plans we are dealing with life has served up..I personally have had to make some decisions to preserve my sense of well being and one of those unfortunantly has been to admit to myself that I can no longer do everything that I want to and maintain a sense of calm in my life. For me, that means that I have had to take a good long look at my choices, goals and the life that I and we (Matthias and myself) want to live. The number one issue that we focused on is that I am away from home ALOT, and not for hours at a time but sometimes weeks at a time and it is not working for us..it is one thing for me to live out of a suitcase but it is another for him to have to work full time and maintain household..he would never, ever complain because he is awesome like that but I know how much work it is for me when I am home. The second point is for my health, headaches, not being able to sleep, and a sense of anxiety..is not the answer. I am fortunate enough at this point in my life where I do not have to fight for and account for every last penny earnd and spent, to have a wonderful husband that wants me to be able to relax and enjoy this life. It has been an uphill struggle for almost 3 years now and I am tired, tired of not being accepted for who I am where I live, tired of making demands on myself trying to always be better, tired of people who have no respect for our marriage, tired of trying to help others who do not want to help themselves..I am just tired, and to be honest a bit on the angry side. So you ask..what does this all mean?? It means that I am simplifying my life, it means that I will not be continuing in PA School, it means that I will not be signing up for every single opportunity that I can with the Reserves, it means that we will be taking some time as a couple to get to know each other again, it means that I will be taking some time to regain a sense of balance in my life..or to gain a sense of balance is more like it..previously as a single parent everything was on automatic and I did not have the luxury to think about where and what I wanted to be..I just was. It means that I will be doing some deep soul searching and most likely it will mean that I try out alot of crafty things..painting, sewing, baking..and that I will be putting my body to use again..exercising and maybe even a little dancing. It means we will actually have time to maybe do some traveling, some exploring, some enjoyment in growing older together..getting off of the hamster wheel.
For some of you maybe you will think loser, life is about getting ahead, about having more..I have lived that life and to be honest..maybe it did more damage than good..maybe it is time to be a regular woman, not an over acheiver who is always in high gear, who moved ahead and probably missed a whole lot of life chances because that is what was expected..maybe if I had taken some more time to relax and had not always searched and strived for more life would be different..we have enough right now, our life is good..it is time that I understand that and it is time that I am thankful for what God has given me.